Managing Conflict
Conflict is the process that results when one person (or a group of people) perceives that another person or group is frustrating, or about to frustrate, an important concern. It involves incompatible differences between parties that result in interference or opposition. The differences themselves are not causes of conflict. Rather, conflict resides in human reactions to such differences. Conflict can have either constructive or destructive effects depending upon how it is managed.
Typical sources of conflict include personal behaviour / difference factors, communication difficulties, and organisational factors such as size of the division / organisation, hierarchical distinctions, misuse of power, perception of unfair reward systems / unfair advantage, resource interdependency etc. Typically people react with a ‘flight’ or ‘fight’ reaction to the conflict. That is, they either avoid a confrontation, deny that there is a problem or leave the area. Or they may go into ‘attack’ mode by snapping back a response, becoming angry or verbally abusive or, at the extreme, physically aggressive. Neither of these reactions serves to resolve the situation.
Conflict can occur when you least expect it. Somebody says the wrong thing, at the wrong time and then it starts. The recipient is not always aware of what they have done to trigger the anger. Within a work team conflict is often the result of low morale, unclear work guidelines or expectations, confusing work environment, lack of resources, overwork etc. This is particularly evident in organisations where there is strong resistance to change, entrenched beliefs or ‘entitlements’ and a shortage of new ideas. The way to resolve conflict is (after your initial shock reaction) to take a deep breath and step back, approach the individual and seek to agree on an amicable solution. Note that this can only be done after all the emotions have gone or at least subsided.
The best place to resolve conflict is within the person or workgroup where it originated. However if you cannot resolve the problem amicably, you should seek the expertise of someone who will be able to hear both sides of the story and address the concern from an objective position. In a family environment, this may be someone from your local community centre of a mediator from the local Magistrate’s Court. In a work environment the Employee Relations team are there to offer their assistance, according to the organisation’s policies and procedures. Sometimes external mediators are engaged to assist as well. They can provide an objective assessment of the situation and through open discussion, recommend the best way to move forward.
This modified excerpt is taken from the book “Positive Psychology Coaching” by Dr Susanne Knowles which is available from www.amazon.com and www.barnesandnoble.com.
Book Reviews and a Book Trainer are available on www.susanne.knowles.com.
