Getting ready for change

People will only make changes in their life when their ‘pain’ is too great to endure it any more or the prospect of some future goal is too enticing to not go for it (the ‘gain’). Why don’t people want to change? Because they are too comfortable the way they are? Because they can’t be bothered? Because it’s not really necessary? Because they’re too scared? That’s what it comes down to. We get emotional when we feel the need for change, and go through a series of emotions before we can accept the changes.  

The emotions that people go through when a change is announced have been likened to the stages of grief as developed by Elizabeth Kübler-Ross. Kübler-Ross originally applied these stages to people suffering from terminal illness. She later expanded the model to apply to any form of catastrophic personal loss (job, income, freedom). Such losses may also include significant life events such as the death of a loved one, major rejection, end of a relationship or divorce, drug addiction, incarceration, the onset of a disease or chronic illness, an infertility diagnosis, as well as many tragedies and disasters. She described five stages in the grief process which, depending on the nature of the loss and the particular circumstances, and the support they receive, may take people up to two years to go through. 

• Denial 
• Anger 
• Bargaining 
• Depression 
• Acceptance  

Some adaptations of the original Kübler-Ross model add a further stage called Moving on, which occurs when the change has been fully accepted and integrated into normal daily life.   

These stages may take several months to play out. You cannot rush the emotional processes that individuals go through. In fact, to force a premature acceptance of the change often just sends the anger and bargaining underground, resulting in an extended period of going through these stages. At times, individuals may get stuck in a certain stage and unfortunately never leave it. This can lead to continued resentment and anger at home and at work; living and/or working with people in this situation is not fun for anyone. Processes that can assist individuals cope with these changes include offering psychological services, counselling services and employee assistance programs. 

Believing you can change  

The concept of self-efficacy (or believing in yourself) lies at the centre of social cognitive theory. This theory emphasises the role of observational learning, social experience and reciprocal determinism in the development of personality. According to Bandura (1977), a person’s attitudes, abilities and cognitive skills comprise what is known as the self-system. This system plays a major role in how we perceive situations and how we behave in response to different situations. Self-efficacy plays an essential part in this self-system. Self-efficacy is your belief in your capacity to organise and execute the actions that are required to manage prospective situations i.e. your belief in your ability to succeed in a particular situation or achieve at a particular task, especially when that task is new, novel or difficult. These beliefs are determinants of how people think, behave and feel.  

Since Bandura’s seminal paper, self-efficacy has become one of the most studied topics in psychology because our self-efficacy can have a significant impact on everything that we do and how we think - from psychological states to motivation and behaviour. Why? Because virtually all people can identify goals they want to accomplish - things they would like to change and things they would like to achieve. However, putting plans into action is not that simple. Bandura and others found that an individual’s self-efficacy plays a major role in how goals, tasks and challenges are approached.  

People with a strong sense of self-efficacy view challenging problems as tasks to be mastered, develop deeper interest in the activities in which they participate, form a stronger sense of commitment to their interests and activities, and recover more quickly from setbacks and disappointments. People with a weak sense of self-efficacy do the reverse. They avoid challenging tasks, believe that difficult tasks and situations are beyond their capabilities, focus on personal failings and negative outcomes, and quickly lose confidence in their personal abilities. Hence, identifying the degree to which people believe in themselves, and that they can attain their goals, is at the heart of every motivational and reward program leading to change. If clients don’t believe they can make the changes, they will self-sabotage, which is called a ‘self-fulfilling prophecy’.  

The belief in your own ability to achieve begins to form in early childhood as children deal with a wide variety of experiences, tasks and situations. Self-efficacy continues to grow throughout life as people acquire new skills, experiences and understanding.  According to Bandura, there are four major sources of self-efficacy: 

• Mastery Experiences:  Performing a task successfully strengthens our sense of self-efficacy. However, failing to adequately deal with a task or challenge can undermine and weaken self-efficacy. 
• Social Modelling: Witnessing other people successfully completing a task is another important source of self-efficacy. In particular, observing people similar to yourself make a success of their life by sustained effort increases our belief that we too possess the capabilities to master similar, difficult activities. 
• Social Persuasion: Bandura also asserted that people could be persuaded to believe that they have the skills and capabilities to succeed. Verbal encouragement from others helps people overcome self-doubt thus allowing them to focus on putting their best effort into the task at hand. 
• Psychological Responses: Moods, emotional states, physical reactions and stress levels play an important role in self-efficacy. They all impact on how a person feels about their ability to perform in a particular situation, whether real or perceived e.g. making a public presentation.  By learning how to minimise stress and elevate mood when facing difficult or challenging tasks, people can improve their sense of self-efficacy. 

This modified excerpt is taken from the book “Positive Psychology Coaching” by Dr Susanne Knowles which is available from www.amazon.com and www.barnesandnoble.com. 

Book Reviews and a Book Trainer are available on www.susanne.knowles.com.